While relentless CD-pusher Mariah Carey --pregnant with twins at 53-- will co-star in TruTV's new reality series "Womb With A View", it is her gestation trench that'll get top billing: Mariah's having cameras installed in her uterus.
... Miss Piggy nowadays? Sure, it's better than when she looked like a spider monkey, but still...
"I can't wait for the world to see the inside of my pooter," Carey said at a press conference, side-by-side with emotionally-castrated husband/stepson Nick Fury, who hosts 'Ebonics, Traffic and Weather' on New York City's 92.3 K-Rock. "I can only imagine that it will look like an enchanted city of gestationing elves. Unicorns are pretty."
Initially unable to conceive due to issues in her lady department, the team of fertility doctors who made Carey's uterus as hospitable to life as the Amazon Rainforest (and every bit as susceptible to logging) will be installing 6 micro-cameras in her lady-plumbing, which will send HD 1040p video directly into a DVD recorder attached to the singer's gelatinous ass.
"We are very excited to bring Mr. and Mrs. Carey's most personal of processes to the basic-cable viewing public," said Tru-TV's President Jane Cocharan, who turned once-respectable CourtTV into a 24-hour-a-day cavalcade of sh-tty reality shows and infomercials. "Hopefully, we'll be able to draw a larger audience than our closest competitor, C-Span VI en espanol."
"God, if only a washed-up football player would slice his wife's throat open," concluded Cocharan. "We'd be back on top!!"