Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 30 March 2011

image for Dancing With The Stars: The Season's First 'Casualty' Is "Psycho" Mike Catherwood
Lacey Schwimmer has been described by President Obama as being the sexiest dancer on 'Dancing With The Stars.'

HOLLYWOOD - The first Dancing With The Stars contestant to be sent home this season is the co-host of radio's Loveline "Psycho" Mike Catherwood.

At the start of the DWTS season 97 percent of the shows viewers had never heard of him.

But now after performing for two weeks it is a safe bet that the number has probably now gone down to 91 percent.

An inside source who works in the shows 'Vote Counting Department' and who stressed that she did not want her name revealed informed Tittle Tattle Tonight that out of 30 million votes that were cast for the eleven celebrity contestants Catherwood received 53, as in 10 X 5 + 3 = 53.

The source whom we shall refer to by the fake name of Lonnie Evelyn Zuckerbrott, 29, of Avocado Heights, went on to say that Catherwood broke the all time record for having received the least amount of votes.

That record had stood since January of 2006, during season 2, when Kenny Manye received a total of 54 votes which included 47 votes family members alone.

Catherwood told 3T's reporter Pico de Gallo, that he felt bad for his professional partner Lacey Schwimmer because she devoted 14 hours a day trying to just get him to get rid of his pigeon toed stance, which she was not able to do, even with the aid of a ball peen hammer.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Personally, I feel bad for the American dudes who watched the show just to see the tremendously sexy Lacey Schwimmer sensuously undulate those lasciviously licentious hips of hers not to mention her titillating voluptuous tits, her salaciously sexually provocative groin region, and her lustfully erotic botty.]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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