Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 17 March 2011

image for American Idol's Haley "Lipstick Girl" Reinhart May Be Doing A Lipstick Commercial
This is a photo of the lipstick that Haley Reinhart used on American Idol and which she has now placed on eBay.

HOLLYWOOD - No matter how far Haley Reinhart goes or does not go on this years edition of American Idol, she will now forever be remembered as "Lipstick Girl."

During Reinhart's AI performance she choose a song by Whitney "Hmmm" Houston tilted "I'm Your Baby Tonight" and then she proceeded to prove exactly why she is a 'baby.'

Sometime during the song Haley's overly 'lipsticked' red lips touched the microphone and then for whatever weird reason Haley then touched her microphone to her chin, her cheek, her nose, and her Adam's apple leaving red lipstick marks all over her face.

Randy "The Black Dawg" Jackson started laughing so hard the bro almost fell out of his chair. Jennifer "La Tush" Lopez either did not notice or else she was too embarrassed to mention it.

And Steven "Lips" Tyler said that she was a little pitchy, a little off-key, but added that he loved her Ringling Brothers, Barnum & Bailey Circus clown look.

Ryan "Peaches" Seacrest could not stand to see Haley standing there like she was some little backwoods hillbilly who had never in her life worn lipstick so he took out his handkerchief, spit on it, and tried to wipe the lipstick off of Haley's chin, cheek, nose, and Adam's apple.

But alas, the dashing, debonair, dandy only made it worse, as now her makeup base came off exposing about 16, before unseen freckles, blemishes, and a boo-boo (pimple).

Reinhart was visibly shaken since she had just basically had her face spat on by Ryan Seacrest on live television before 30 million people.

But all was not lost as a spokesperson for the show stated that when the show was over Pia Toscano - the gorgeously stunning Pia Toscano took her aside and explained all about lipsticks, microphones, maturity, and how you never ever let the microphone touch your mouth even if you think it will gain you points with the judges by having them think that you have the sultry look of a nightclub singer.

Jacob "Ebeneezer Baptist" Lusk went up to Haley backstage and told her that he and Justin "Little Adam Lambert" Durbin were laughing so hard when they saw the lipstick all over her face that both had to make a mad dash for the little boys room before they peed in their pants.

And Naima Adedapo, who last week was in the bottom three, remarked to Scotty "Alfred E. Neuman" McCreery, after seeing the 'red-faced' Haley, "Alright! Well Scotty my country dude, I guess dat means dat 'Lipstick Girl' be gettin' her butt sent on back home ta Illinois uh huh, and dat's what I be sayin'."

A very embarrassed Haley Reinhart was asked backstage how she felt about the whole "Lipstick Malfunction."

She shook her head and replied that she was really feeling very bad and totally depressed until she got a call from a representative for Revmel Cosmetics about the possibility of having her make a lipstick commercial for $1 million.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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