Written by Dr. Billingsgate
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Wednesday, 2 March 2011

Once again Oprah Winfield has recreated herself. Announcing today that she has decided to curl her hair and sit in Daddy Warbuck's lap in a rendition of the 1982 Broadway production of Orphan Annie. In the original play, the character of Annie was played by 10 year old cutie, Aileen Quinn.

Over the years, Oprah has always had a soft spot in her heart for orphans, even building a school for them in Africa which she still supports. Now, even though she has long passed the little girl stage of her life, she feels it's important that the plight of orphans be given new meaning.

"No matter how old you are, once you lose your parents, you'll always be an orphan," she said on her show this morning. "Even Orphan Annie has to grow up, and who better to play her role than me?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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