Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 2 March 2011

image for Christina Aguilera and Lady Gaga Deny Those Ever Persistent Lesbian Rumors
Padre Island, Texas - If you look closely at the lower right you can see Lady Gaga and Christina Aguilera sunbathing.

WEST HOLLYWOOD - The rumor mill seems to be working 24/7 when it comes to the comings and goings of two of the top singers in America Lady Gaga and Christina Aguilera.

Lady Gaga who was just named 'The Most Popular Woman In Delaware' is getting ready to head into the recording studio and record a song written especially for her by Ke$ha and Neil $edaka.

The song is titled, "Hey Yo Yo, It Is What It Is My Bro." Lady Gaga told Tittle Tattle Tonight that the single may be included in the new motion picture from TouchRock Films entitled, Zorro VI - The Curse of The Effen Maracas.

Meanwhile Christina Aguilera who recently completed an Internet course on the Star Spangled Banner just returned from performing in Sydney, Australia at The Hippity Hopping Kangaroo Coliseum before a sold out crowd of 97,891.

Last week Christina visited Baltimore, Maryland, where she met with the relatives of Francis Scott Key, who wrote the National Anthem.

She talked to Buckland McPolaroid Key, the great, great, great, grandson of Francis Scott and she apologized to him for messing up his great, great, great, grandfather's lyrics at this year's Super Bowl.

Buckland told her not to worry about it that she was not the first bitch or son-of-a-bitch to forget the words.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Buckland McPolaroid Key recently turned 99 and he, along with Agatha Bundina Duraweather, 102, of Bangor, Maine, are considered to be two of the biggest cussers on the entire Atlantic seaboard coastline.]

Tittle Tattle Tonight asked Aguilera about the rumors that apparently started down on the Citrus Coast (Florida) about her and Lady Gaga being a couple of 'biscuit bumpers.'

Christina said that she has been hearing those rumors ever since her and Lady Gaga were caught feeding each other grapes down at Padre Island Beach just outside of Corpus Christi, Texas two years ago.

She denied the rumors saying that Lady Gaga is very pretty looking but she just has a hard time dealing with her habit of always grabbing her crotch like baseball players do.

Lady Gaga was also asked about the lesbian rumor and she answered that she cannot deny the fact that yes she does find Chrissy to be physically attractive and sexually desirable but she was quick to add that maybe if Miss Aguilera had a little bit more Wawa (bulge) in her crotch region then maybe they could have something.

In other news. USA Sunup is reporting that Smart Phones have been outlawed in Arkansas, Arizona, and Alaska.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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