Written by dutch
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Friday, 18 February 2011

image for Del Boy and Rodney Fined For Fraud Over Lapland Theme Park
Christmas

Del Boy and Rodney have been fined for fraudulently running a "Lapland" Christmas Theme Park in Dorset.

The wide boys tricked the punters into believing that they would be going into the Winter Wonderland of Lapland; they falsely claimed that there would be Father Christmas, Elves and Reindeer.

However, the reality was starkly different; it was a muddy field with a few tawdry fairly lights and a plastic polar bear. There was an old geezer in a second-hand Father Christmas suit handing out cheaply rapped tat that had fallen off the back of a lorry. Yes it was Uncle Albert. Cassandra and Rodney were running a cheap, greasy burger van and charging top dollar for their greasy fare. Rodney and Raquel were running a tea tent selling cups of tea and a mince pie for £5.

Understandably the punters were not best pleased. The mums and dads had promised their precocious little darlings Father Christmas, Rudolph a polar bear and a sleigh ride in Lap Land. Instead of these delights they had an old donkey with one antler with a false red nose. The donkey was pulling an old pram which had been made into a little go cart.

Rodney and Del Boy had been hoping to rake it in and had sold tickets at £50 a family for the Lapland Experience with fake Lapland Money available £10 for £7.50 Lapland Dollars. Understandably the punters were furious when they found that all there was, were a few tents in a muddy field with some tawdry tinsel wrapped around a few artificial Christmas trees. There were a few tacky Christmas lights draped over a tent which was Father Christmas's Grotto. The Santa was drinking heavily and swearing like a trooper. The children were given a plastic action toy made in China; boys and girls were all given the same plastic toy which was only worth 50 p.

When the customers asked for their money back the Trotter brothers said "Sorry Mate, No Income Tax No Vat No Money Back No Guarantee". The brothers said that they had given the families a 'lovely day out with entertainment for the kiddies.

We even had a tea tent and provided a lovely area for mums to breastfeed their babes said an angry Raquel who insisted that she had worked like a Trojan to help Del Boy's latest get rich scheme.

The judges found the Trotter brothers guilty of deception and fraud and they have been ordered to reimburse all their poor scammed customers.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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