In a sudden turn of events, it was announced today that Eva-Marie Westbroek will no longer play the eponymous lead in the opera, Anna Nicole. Citing creative differences, Ms. Westbroek, has been released from her contract, according to enfant terrible, Mark-Anthony Turnage, the opera's composer.
The work, based on the life and legend of the late sexpot, Anna Nicole Smith, was set to premier later this week at Covent Garden. Anonymous sources are claiming that the reason for the departure of the beautiful and accomplished soprano was her difficulty reaching high C while dancing nude onstage.
However, no sooner did Mr. Turner announce the loss of one star than he declared, "My new lead for Anna Nicole is Susan Boyle."
When reached, Ms. Boyle confirmed the announcement and said she will begin jogging and weight-lifting tomorrow.