BEVERLY HILLS - In an amazing turn of events regarding one of the most prolific expousers of the paparazzi phenomenon that has come to be known as 'Upskirt' shots, or as they refer to it up in Oregon, 'Beaver' shots Britney Spears was photographed exiting out of a car and she was actually wearing underwear.
The horde of photographers that had gathered around her car could not believe it when Ms. Spears opened her car door and revealed that she was actually wearing underwear; a lavender pair of string bikini panties.
[EDITOR'S NOTE: Spears later pointed out that the underwear had been a gift from her hair stylist Mr. Tabby of Topanga Canyon who is the uncle of the Disney Channel's Brenda Song].
In the past, on more than five occasions Ms. Spears had revealed a somewhat panoramic view of her playpen (bikini burger).
And on one occasion, that went out world-wide, when she was on her way to get her hair done at the beauty salon, Britney actually was photographed sans-undies with the C-section scar on her lower bikini line clearly visible.
Britney's publicist later tried to say that the C-section scar had been photoshopped but Britney's younger sister 19-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears did in fact tell Gazebo Serengeti, a reporter for Bedroom Pillow Talk that the photo had not been retouched, airbrushed, decrotched, degroined, or denookied in any way, shape, or form.
Meanwhile a reporter for Tittle Tattle Tonight, Pico de Gallo noticed that Britney was holding a little girls doll in her left hand. He asked her who the doll was for.
Spears said that she had purchased the doll named Missy Pissy at a Toys "Be" Us in Watts.
She said that she was taking it to give to a Sonia Savannah Fezzwinkle the little six-year-old daughter of one of her ex-maids Mangozelle Fezzwinkle, who was in the hospital recovering from guppy bites.
Britney said that fish experts say that one out of every nine million guppies are born with razor sharp teeth, kind of like Ricky Gervais' teeth. And it seems that little Sonia Savannah's mom had bought the one in nine million.
Ms. Spears stated that if the doll did not cheer Sonia Savannah up she was going to give her $100 in quarters and hope that, that would put a smile on the little girl's face.
In other news. NASCAR officials in Arizona admit that they recently fired three illegal alien race car drivers who have since been deported back to their homes in Costa Rica, Mexico, and Argentina.