Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 5 February 2011

image for Naomi Campbell AKA The Queen of Mean Walks Off Piers Morgan's Show
Naomi Campbell at the age of two and her English nanny Lollie Kidderminster.

NEW YORK CITY - Well Piers Morgan has finally made the big time. He has just had one of his guests walk off his show.

Morgan was interviewing the woman who is known as "The Queen of Mean" Naomi Campbell on his brand new show Piers Morgan Tonight.

He asked her if she found that a lot of people were surprised to hear her talk with a British accent. Campbell fired back that she was born in Britain and so why should the fact that she had a British accent even come up since she was after all British.

Morgan replied that it was really all just a matter of her having been lucky enough to have been born in England.

He pointed out to her that if he had been born in Zimbabwe, Kenya, or Lower Zamgola that it would not mean that he was a native African tribesman simply because he spoke with an African accent.

Naomi got all huffy. She pounded the desk with her size 10 high heel shoe and said that it appeared to her that he was a racist.

Piers got offended and said that if he was a racist he would not have even bothered to have booked her arrogantly pompous ass on his show.

She then asked him how come he was acting like a Taliban bigot. He replied that he was not acting like a Taliban bigot and told her that the name of his show was Piers Morgan Tonight and not Naomi Campbell Tonight and that he was the chap who was going to be asking the bloody bloomin questions.

He then asked her why it is that she feels the need to go around hitting her employees.

Campbell was so mad she could not reply.

Morgan continued, "I mean, look her Ms. Campbell it is a fact and there is documentation to corroborate my story that you have hit many of your assistants including housekeepers, cooks, and chauffeurs.

You have also hit hair stylists, gynecologists, and most recently a TSA pat down inspector. Now what in the name of civilized sanity do you have to say about that you self-centered, egomaniacal, sarcastic she-bitch?"

Campbell stood up. She told Morgan that he could not make a pimple on Larry King's ass and she walked out.

As she was leaving Morgan told her that she has the worst British accent that he had ever heard including Peru's belly dancing sex goddess Shakira.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Shakira is actually from Colombia, but we got Morgan's point.]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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