Written by Lady Godiva
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Sunday, 30 January 2011

image for To keep her figure for THE wedding, Miss Kate Middleton joins the Harbour Club
You will NEVER see Kate Middleton looking sweaty like this young woman

Kate is not as vain as this headline suggests. She walked down the streets of London, before joining the gym, looking for the fattest women she could find. She approached each of them (ten in all) and offered to pay for a year's membership at the Harbour Club. Some of the obese women she had approached refused her offer and were extremely offended because they hadn't realized they were, indeed, overweight.

Eventually Kate had her ten 'charity cases' and arranged to meet with them outside of the Harbour Club (Lady Di's gym, by the way).

On the day of the meeting, she eagerly waited for her obese friends to arrive and when they had all gathered she led them towards the Club doors, only to embarass these new 'fat friends' even further because not one of them would fit through the entrance door.

The Harbour Club is an exclusive gym and has been built with entrances only 30" wide in an effort to keep 'the fatties' out. Apparently they do not want anyone 'sweating' on the premises.

Feeling rather deflated (which the women with her, wished THEY could be) - Kate apologized and took them to The East End Boxing Club instead - for a workout.

Kate couldn't stand the smell of the sweaty athletes training inside, so she left after 2 minutes, promising to meet her ten new friends for a slap-up meal at McDonalds when they had finished their workout.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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