Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Madonna, singer, Feud, Prince

Sunday, 23 January 2011

image for Madonna and Prince Finally Bury The Hatchet (But Not Into Each Other)
Madonna and Guy Ritchie's divorce cake. (Photo courtesy of Barbara Walters).

BROOKLYN - The artist formerly known as Prince and the former singer formerly known as Madonna have finally grown up and ended their 25 year long feud.

Yes according to Tittle Tattle Tonight Prince Rogers Countessa Nelson and Madonna Louise Veronica Beyonce Ciccone have apparently French kissed and made up.

The two just happened to meet at Uncle Vinnie's Boston Bagels Bar & Grill in downtown Brooklyn. Prince had a baloney bagel with a slice of watermelon on the side and Madonna had a macaroni bagel with a Butterball turkey on the side.

Fellow patrons could not get over how skinny Prince looked and how fat Madonna looked. Someone said that Prince has been on a diet water diet for the past seven weeks.

Bruno Rickafelli of Passaic, New Jersey said that Prince looked like a black swizzle stick. His girlfriend Wanda Gina Tuckalino said that if Prince was any skinnier he could carry himself in his pocket.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Ladies and gentlemen, I have to say that both Abel and I have no idea exactly what the hell Wanda Gina meant. I understand that W.G. can put the vino (wine) away like an Italian mafioso.]

Bruno went on to say that Madonna from the looks of her thunder thighs, bingo wings (fat upper arms), and out yonder ass has not missed a meal in 19 years.

Bruno laughed as he said that if one looks at La Madonna from the side she looks a little bit like a dented refrigerator, assuming of course that refrigerators had hair from hell, industrial love handles, feet like an NBA basketball player, and a slight moustache.

After Prince and Madonna finished French kissing he paid his tab, got up from the table, and waited for the valet to bring his Rolls Royce around.

Madonna paid her bill, was helped up off her lard ass, and walked outside towards the subway station.

Wanda Gina walked after her and asked if she could have her autograph. Madonna turned around and said that she was tired and that even if she wasn't she charges $75 for her autograph which she probably could not afford.

Wanda Gina shot her the finger and told her that she needed to redo her hit from 1985 "Material Girl" but only change it to "Material Friggin Grandmother."

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Madonna recorded a song in 1987 titled "La Isla Bonita." Due to the fact that the song has some Spanish lyrics it has been banned in Arizona. And interestingly enough East Los Angeles has banned the playing of the Mark Lindsay song "Arizona." ]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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