Written by Abel Rodriguez
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Sunday, 23 January 2011

image for Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, and Heidi Montag Agree To Appear In "The Naked PMS'ing Lesbian Vampire Bitches From Hell!"
A dressed vampire extra in the scene with the adult longhorn steer and the three African pygmies.

WEST HOLLYWOOD - Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, and Heidi Montag have all finally agreed to star in Charleen Belle Pinnzucker's adaptation of the epic novel The Naked PMS'ing Lesbian Vampire Bitches From Hell.

Pinnzucker who is considered to be the world's foremost female director and actually ranked at number four on The Goodness List of America's Top Directors and/or Producers said that she has been trying to get the trio of women together to do the film for 14 months.

She laughed and said that she would get two of them but the third one was not available, and then she would get the other two and the third one was unavailable, and then she would get the other two but the third one was not available.

Finally she managed to dangle a big enough carrot in front of all three and she is pleased to announce that filming should start within a few days.

The movie which centers around three nudist vampire lesbian bitches who are horribly affected by their monthly period is actually based on a real life case that occurred in Bulgaria during the early summer of 1959.

The three real life characters were actually identified in Lavadora Klinghoffer's epic novel of the same name. Since then two of the women have since moved to Russia where they took on false identities and the third one moved to California and is actually still working at the age of 87, in the souvenir shop at the La Brea Tar Pits.

Klinghoffer has been asked to identify the California woman by at least 47 different newspapers, 38 television stations, and 9 television news programs, but she has vowed to never reveal the woman's name.

The movie will be shot on location in Dover, Delaware which bears a tremendously striking resemblance to Bulgaria during the late 1580's.

Charleen Belle Pinnzucker's Movies Include:

  • Bite Me Bitch: A Vampire Comedy
  • Wikileaks - The Naked Truth
  • The Wizard of Oz 5 - Dorothy Gets Her Corn Shuck Patted Down
  • The Obama's - Dat's Right We Sho Nuff Be Da Fust Family Fa Shizzle Ma Nizzle

Vampire Fact #73: In one of the world's most interesting mysteries research gynecological scientists have as yet not been able to figure out why it is that female vampires never ever pee even if they drink lots of beer, coffee, or Diet Dr. Peppers.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 multiplied by 2?

9 12 6 18

Go to top