Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 21 January 2011

image for Lady Gaga To Star In A Nude Musical With Robert Pattinson and Zac Efron
Zac Efron dressed as Parsley, a closet zombie. (Photo courtesy of Ellen DeGeneres).

WEST HOLLYWOOD - Left Coast Mirror Magazine is reporting that Lady Gaga has just announced that she will be appearing in the Salvo Classacotti film The Nude Singing Zombies of Pomona.

The Cripple Creek Motion Picture film will also star two of the hottest male stars in Hollywood, Robert Pattinson and Zac Efron.

Lady G. will be portraying Yogurtina, a zombie who returns to Pomona after having spent three years living on a diet potato farm in Pocatello, Idaho.

She moves in with her brother Parsley played by Robert Pattinson who is what is known as a closet zombie. He dresses and acts like a zombie but only in the privacy of his trailer house bedroom.

Zac Efron stars as Gizmo Backfeister, Parsley's neighbor who is rumored to be in the government's Witness Protection Program.

When living up in Idaho, Yogurtina had fallen in love with a shy potato picker from Boise, Idaho, who quickly dumped her once he found out that she had the names Buster, Biff, Bucky, and Kanye all tattooed on her vagina.

The movie revolves around the fact that even people who are zombies can have some socially redeeming qualities about them. In Yogurtina's case she loves to help kids collect miniature fleas, she can play the glockenspiel with her tongue, and she makes her own peanut butter.

It's really no wonder that when Gizmo (Efron) meets her for the very first time as she is standing in the kitchen, that he instantly falls head-over-heels in love with her. Of course the fact that she was wearing a Los Angeles Dodgers baseball cap and nothing else may have had a little something to do with it.

Co-starring as some of the zombies are Boo Boo Stewart, Brenda Song, Betty White, Brett Favre, and introducing in his very first movie role the former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld.

Lady Gaga, Kara DioGuardi, and Mick Jagger will be writing the ten songs for the movie's soundtrack.

The film will be shot in and around Beverly Hills which will be decorated to look exactly like Pomona.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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