Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 7 January 2011

image for Lindsay Lohan To Star In "The Wizard of Oz 5 - Dorothy Gets Her Corn Shuck Patted Down"
Lindsay Lohan's pet cat Miss Bitter Bitch, who has reportedly attacked three pit bulls.

HOLLYWOOD - Lindsay Lohan hadn't been out of The Henry and Betty Ford Rehab Clinic for more than two hours when she was approached by a noted Hollywood producer to star in the Lions Face Motion Picture Company film The Wizard of Oz 5 - Dorothy Gets Her Corn Shuck Patted Down.

Lohan spoke to the film's producer/director Charlene Belle Pinnzucker who offered her $3 million to appear in the classic film. At first Lohan wanted $4 million but she soon realized that since she had not made a film in several years she would accept Pinnzucker's offer.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Lohan had also heard that if she refused to accept the $3 million the part would have been offered to Scarlett Johansson, who had already said that if it was offered to her she would take it in a New York second.]

LiLo Lohan has already appeared in three of the Wizard of Oz sequels. She was nominated for an Oscar for her first sequel, The Wizard of Oz 2 - Dorothy Returns To Kansas And Gets Gang Tickled By The Farm Hands.

She was later nominated for another Oscar for The Wizard of Oz 3 - Dorothy Gets Her Crops Rotated. Both times she ended up losing out to Sandra Bullock. First for Bullock's film Baddaboom Baddabing - The Bing Crosby Story and then for Bullock's football movie False Start Prior To The Snap.

SIDENOTE: Lohan's mother and father feel that as long as they can keep LiLo away from some of her 'bottom feeding' friends (and themselves) that she has an excellent chance of never again returning back to The Henry and Betty Ford Rehab Clinic.]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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