This morning, Gordon Ramsay's wife, Tana, visited him at the The Priory Clinic where he is residing following his admittance. His admittance to the Clinic had been brought about as a result of his recent traumatic trip to Costa Rica to film illegal fishing.
Tana spent two hours with Gordon and spoke with reporters following her visit. Visibly shaken Tana said:
"Well, Gordon is just not his normal abrasive, obnoxious, vain self at the moment. I hardly recognized him. He is speaking softly and letting other people get 'words in' during conversations. He is smiling and hasn't said 'fuck' or 'cunt' once. It's quite worrying. I fear for his sanity.
Also, the nurses had to strap his arms down for the first four hours that he was here as he was pulling at his hair, trying to pull it out at the roots. Now, that hair transplant was not cheap so it had to be protected at all costs. Eventually they gave him valium, intravenously, and he settled down somewhat.
During my visit with Gordon he began sobbing uncontrollably, thinking back to his first love, football. Not many people know he had his heart set on becoming a professional footballer in his teens, but a premature injury dashed his hopes.
He is wondering if he'd be in such a mess today if he had been able to realize his dream. I attempted to console him by reminding him of all the scandals in the news these days, involving professional footballs and their sexual exploits, Wayne Rooney caught taking a pee in public etc. I told Gordon I would not have enjoyed being a WAG.
Gordon fired my dad recently, who had been his business partner for years. Well Gordon didn't actually fire my dad himself, he got someone else to do it because Gordon IS a bit of a wimp really. I hate to say that about him but...it's true. This cause a rift in the family, as you can imagine.
So, you see, Gordon has a lot on 'his plate' these days. The stay at The Priory can do nothing but good. I do hope they get his medications right this time. He needs something to 'take him down a peg or two'. I'll admit he is vain and spends longer in the bathroom getting ready, that I do. He is constantly looking in mirrors and preening himself.
He is also obsessed with celebrities and has a huge collection of photographs with him and so called 'celebrities' even the 'empty headed bimbos' like Paris Hilton and Paula Abdul. Sharon Osbourne is one of his favourites...that's another reason I'd like him thoroughly checked over whilst staying at the Priory. His values are a little 'out of wack' at the moment. That's putting it mildly."
Tana promised to keep us updated on Gordon's status.