Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 26 December 2010

image for Scarlett Johansson Denies That Her Husband Is Divorcing Her Because Of Sandra Bullock
An imprint of Sandra Bullock's lips which she gave to Scarlett on her birthday November 22.

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Actress and singer Scarlett Johansson has stated that the worst Christmas present she has ever received is her husband Ryan Reynolds presenting her with divorce papers on December 23, 2010.

The blonde sex symbol said that she was totally shocked and at first thought that he was handing her the deed to a brand new beach house on Malibu Beach that they had been looking at.

The 26-year-old Johansson first became quite popular when she starred in the 1998 motion picture The Horse Whisperer with Robert Redford and Carnie Wilson.

Scarlett also appeared in the sequel The Whispering Horse Whisperer Returns in which Redford also appeared but not Wilson.

The Tinsel Town Times Tribune stated that the reason that Carnie Wilson was not asked to appear in the sequel was due to the fact that her weight had gone from 150 to 300 and there was just no way that she was going to be able to get on a horse without causing some major injuries to the horse.

Reports are that Wilson became so angry that she filed a $1.9 million lawsuit, but the judge threw it out as soon as the notice hit his desk.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: The judge who threw out the lawsuit is Judge Temple Trackalino, who just happens to own a California horse ranch with a stable of 14 horses.]

Friends of Johansson are, to say the least, shocked to hear that Ryan would want to divorce a woman as gorgeous as she is. The actress has won several noteworthy awards including Esquire Magazine's 'Sexiest Woman Alive,' Playboy Magazine's 'Sexiest Celebrity of The Year,' and G-Spot Illustrated Magazine's 'Sexiest Looking Crotch In America.'

When Reynolds was asked why he was divorcing the golden beauty he simply shrugged his shoulders and replied with the obligatory comment of "No comment."

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I heard from a highly reliable inside source that the reason that Reynolds has filed for divorce is because ever since Scarlett was kissed on the mouth on national television by Sandra Bullock she has almost constantly pointed out what a great kisser Bullock is. Johansson, however has expressed that her enjoyment and constant talking about Bullock's kiss is not the reason.]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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