Written by Steddyeddy
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Monday, 6 December 2010

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Strictly judges in a tizzy

Now that Ann Widdecombe has been ejected from popular dancing reality show "Strictly", the Mary Whitehouse Viewers and Listeners Association (MWVLA) are up in arms that the show may now start to verge on the pornographic.

The MWVLA feel that female celebrity dancer Kara Tointon and professional dancer Katya Virshilas, not to mention male celebrity Scott Maslen, are actually far too sexy for their respective male and female viewers. The fear that with Ann Widdecombe gone, long-term staring at scantily-dressed Karas, Katyas or Scotts could cause some viewers, as suggested by the show's name, to strictly come, dancing.

Jane Boring-Bigot, Chairperson of the MWVLA added that prolonged exposure by males to either Miss Tointon's or Miss Virshilas's thighs could cause a severe blood pressure problem where virtually anything not necessarily related to bread or yeast products could rise, and any females looking at Mr Maslen's chest might be likely to moan or even become rather damp.

Miss Boring-Bigot has formally written to the show to ask that Miss Tointon and Miss Virshilas wear baggy, full-length jeans for the remainder of the series.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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