"Mel Gibson has had to endure questions about his stability following a string of controversies. Now he is preparing to relaunch his career by playing a man who befriends a hand-puppet beaver after suffering a breakdown."
This just in, complete with a disturbing photograph of a dishevelled Mel Gibson with his had stuffed up the arse of a beaver (contradiction in terms over here in Canada).
It's rumoured that Mel isn't actually 'acting' but that the series is yet another 'reality' show, filming Mel as he walks around conversing with people through the beaver.
It appears that the psychiatrists treating Mel haven't managed to find the correct mix of medications with which to ply Mel out of his 'sickness' and back into the 'really' sick world in which most of us live.
One of Mel's psychiatrists, Dr. I.M.A. Nutt told our writer,
"Well, Mel is having a great deal of difficulty paying his medical bills these days so we came up with the 'reality series' and he DOES believe he is ACTING so we are killing two birds with one stone you could say.
Mel is getting paid and it will no doubt boost his ego, increase his self-confidence, rid him of his self-loathing - although, to tell the truth I don't believe that last one is a true depiction of Mel's mental state at present.
So it's really a win/win situation. Who knows...Mel MAY make a FULL recovery but we are at our wits end as to how to figure out WHEN he has recovered. He's always as nutty as a fruitcake. We are going to bring in experts from Russia to help us out with Mel."
When asked WHY Russian experts, Dr. Nutt answered,
"Well, because Russia is all over the newspapers lately, what with winning the bid to host the 2018 World Cup and that Russian spy being deported from England, plus the plane crash where a plane lost all three engines. It just seems to be an obvious choice."
Dr. Nutt has agreed to keep us updated on Mel's 'condition.'