Written by anthonyrosania
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Topics: TV, Justin Bieber

Sunday, 5 December 2010

image for Justin Bieber Wimps Out Of Performance On German TV Show

Teen Magazine's Cute Girl Of The Decade, Justin Bieber, walked off of a German TV show, claiming that a critical injury suffered by another performer on the show left him "too weepy" to perform.

The teen singer was scheduled to appear on Germany's game show "Wetten Dass" ('What A--holes Do For Fleeting Fame' in German), but was upstaged by 23-year-old Samuel Koch, who cemented his place in douchebag history by attempting to jump over a speeding Audi station wagon wearing shoes with springs in them, ending up severely injuring himself.

"He vann supposed to run tovard zee car, and jump over zee car," said Watten Dass host Himmler Von Reichsf├╝hrer. "He nly did one of zeese things. 'Boingy, boingy, splat, wahhh!' vas all I heard."

Justin Bieber, who was to perform with some guys named Robbie Williams and Phil Collins, mentioned the incident in a series of Tweets.

"Just want to let my people in Germany know I won't be on Wetten Dass tonight. Some Nazi got hit by a car. It makes me so sad. I'm just too weepy to perform."

@tweenLover19 I'm like 4 1/2 inches, uncut. Head like a mushroom. Very vieny. This tweet can only be seen by you, right?

"Germany I'm sorry we couldn't perform tonight but some things are more important than putting on a show. I'm still getting paid, tho, so HOLLA!"

It was reported that Koch suffered multiple back injuries and fractures and underwent surgery today. His condition is not life-threatening, and he still plans to set the record for catching most shots in the nuts from a potato gun on the Japanese game show "Ni Hao, Kai-Lan" in January.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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