QUEENS, New York - Robert Pattinson was in town visiting an old high school friend Luigi "Knuckles" Scalatori when he was approached by a reporter for the local magazine publication Hey What It Is Yo?
Pattinson was asked if he had heard about the gay remarks that Rush Limbaugh had made on his radio program. Robert stated that he makes it a point not to listen to El Rusho's show since it is filled with lies, lies, and even more lies.
The reporter identified as Johnny "Da Mouth" Pellapilini told Pattinson that Limbaugh had made a remark about the former singer with the band NSYNC Lance Bass. Limbo went on to say that Bass was now a full time member of the gay group NFAIRY.
He then noted that Clay Aiken another gayster was planning on recording a duet with Ricky "DickyBoy" Martin on the old classic "The Banana Boat Song."
After coming back from a commercial Limbaugh then went on to say that he had heard from an unnamed source who had heard from an anonymous inside source that Robert Pattinson and Zac Efron may be changing over and starting to ride sidesaddle.
Limbo said that he will be looking into the matter and he will keep his listeners posted.
Pattinson pointed out that he has heard that R.L. is prone to swinging from the left side of the plate since therapists from throughout America will tell you that a grown man sucking on a 12-inch cigar is not normal, no way, no how, nopers.
Robert added that Rush is just angry because he once told Ellen DeGeneres that the LimburgerMan needed to loose about 100 pounds and that 60 or so had to come off of his fat, ego-inflated head.
From The Unusual Facts Department: Mosquitoes do not bite with their stingers. They bite with little razor-sharp hair follicles that are located on their anal region.