Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: TV, Ice Skating

Wednesday, 24 November 2010

image for ABC's New Reality Show 'Skating With The Stars' Lays A Big, Gigantic Snow Ball!
That's Brandon Mychal Smith skating on the left. The fella on the right is unidentified. (Photo courtesy of Charlie Sheen

HOLLYWOOD - The new reality show Skating With The Stars is filmed just down the hallway from Dancing With The Stars, but apparently no one knows how to get there.

The show which is based on the British show Dancing On Ice premiered in last place and network executives are already seriously contemplating replacing it with reruns of the reality game show Okay Then, So Who Wants To Kiss Rosie O'Donnell For 400 Bucks?

SWTS which stars Vernon Kay as the unknown British host and Tanith Belbin as the unknown color commentator was soundly clobbered by The Not-So-Good Wives of Wichita, Effingly Amazing Wedding Cakes, and 16 And Pregnant.

The producer of Skating With The Stars Agustus P. McMilliprezz says that TV shows that he has produced in the past have all traditionally started off kind of slow but have all soon caught on like California Santa Ana wind fueled wild fires.

McMilliprezz stated that some of his past hit shows include Cooking Meals On A Simple Bunsen Burner; Housewives of Havana, Cuba; and Paper or Plastic? Ginger or Mary Ann?

He pointed out that the six celebrity skaters include Brandon Mychal Smith (?), Jonny Moseley (?), Rebecca Budig (?), Bethenny Frankel (?), Sean Young, no relation to Sean Elliot or Neil Young, and Vince Neil, no relation to Neil Young, Loretta Young, Robert Young, Young Abe Lincoln, or Vince Young.

The three judges include Johnny Weir (?), Lorie Ann Gibson (?), and Dick Button, no relation to Dick Cheney, Andy Dick, or Moby Dick.

Tanith Belbin reportedly left the witness protection program to appear as the shows color commentator, which is somewhat interesting since she is actually Caucasian by birth.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I saw the premier show of Skating With The Stars and I must say that I think that I kind of prefer watching 16 and Pregnant since it is much more exciting listening to the boy crazy young girls try and justify why and how exactly it is that they got knocked up, but then that's just me.]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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