Written by Bureau
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Monday, 22 November 2010

image for Simon Cowell Admits Changed Voices On "The X Factor"

Former judge of the British show, 'The X Factor', Simon Cowell has admitted to a national tabloid that he DID enhance the vocals on the top-rated show.

"Yes, but I only changed it a little", admitted Cowell to reporters of Australia Today, a sister publication of The West Coast Post.

And why would he do such a thing?

"I changed my mind. No I deny what I said before. I thought you were an independent paper. Erase that recording."

So there went the main man, but we never give up so we found a former worker for the studio, plied him with liquor and puffed up his billfold.

"Yeth, old Cow made us take out tha section where that one bitc....little gal got the hiccups. Other eyes, it would ha been a diass asster."

Other things revealed were that one of the finalists had a large wart on her nose but could sing pretty well and so they touched up the film, not the voice.

"Old Crotch was after the LOOKS! He wanted the beast voce he could fine for the finals but early on, it wernt tha werse!"

"That's why Susan Boil got to finis second place. She purdy good sanger but it was tha LOOKS what countered! I gonna be shick!"

This is Dan Hillyard now with The West Coast Post!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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