Written by matthatt
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Topics: Star Trek

Sunday, 21 November 2010

image for Captains Janeway and Picard arrested following Absinth bender
That's me that is.

Shock news within Starfleet this week as two of its most prominent captains have been slung in the brig overnight for getting up to all manner of nefarious shenanigans while on shore leave.

It is well know to anyone who knows, that captaining a star ship can be quite a stressful job, what with all the running around after the hired help to make sure they haven't nicked light bulbs and ensuring that they have stocked the drinks dispenser with enough Earl Grey to feed an army of Earl grey drinkers, as well as getting them to understand that you want the end of the toilet rolls to be folded into a neat triangle shape, so as to assist alacritous arse wiping of star ship staff when on poop breaks from the poop deck.

Starfleet HQ have said that work related stress of universe saving proportions is no excuse for running around the town centre on a Saturday night with your trousers at street level and a traffic cone on your head, while you push a fellow captain around in a stolen supermarket trolley, yelling "MAKE IT SO!, MAKE IT SO!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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