Written by P.M. Wortham
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Wednesday, 3 November 2010

image for Taylor Swift Launches New Fragrance; Repression
Repression: You want it bad, but you can't have it.

Backed by fragrance and makeup giant Elizabeth Armin, Taylor Swift has announced that she will market a new fragrance and body care line of products just in time for the holiday shopping season. With trademark names like Obsession, Passion, Fusion, and Compassion already taken, the next choice best fitting Taylor was "Repression".

"We think it defines Taylor quite well given her current state of being stuck between her cling-on teeny bopper fans and her great personal desire to break free of childhood and become a woman", said the verbose and whimsical assistant to Ms. Swift, Carrie Baggidge. "It will be a mix of citrus notes and musk, which play to both age groups, the 13 to 17 year olds and the 17 to 19 year old customer, and it teeters between fresh and funky at the same time".

Store shelves are starting to receive early shipments of the product which will be placed strategically between Britney Spears and Beyonce fragrances. Repression sales are expected to be brisk with those younger demographics. Marketing experts picked the retail price point to be slightly less than the average teenager's weekly allowance. "Every teenage girl should know what it feels like to be covered in Repression because Taylor does."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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