Written by anthonyrosania
Print this

Saturday, 23 October 2010

image for Russell Brand and Katy Perry Divorce
Katy Perry in her new red wig.

Mere moments after saying, "I do!", Russell Brand and Katy Perry and Russell Brand have jointly announced their divorce.

"Russell Brand and Katy Perry are overjoyed to confirm that their marriage was terminated via divorce on Saturday, October 23. Theirs was a very private and spiritual divorce, attended by the couples' closeted family and friends. The backdrop was the inspirational and majestic countryside of Northern India."

Interestingly, it was Perry, a failed recording artist while signed with Red Hill Records, and Island Records, and Columbia Records, who used the triple talaq mechanism for divorce, as it exists in Sunni and its associated forms of Islam.

"It was kinda funny," said Ke$ha, who was the Maid of Honor. "It simply consisted of her screaming 'I divorce you' at him three times."

Standup comic Brand, 48, who referred to President Bush as "that retarded cowboy fellow," his only funny line ever, was nonplussed.

"F--k, I can't believe it," Brand told the crowd, after apologizing profusely for his hair, his two Comedy Central specials, and 'Get Him To The Greek', "I thought I was doing that ugly cow a favor by marrying her. Oh, well. Back to men."

Brand then reiterated his contempt for Americans and called for a Jihad against Christians worldwide, before slipping headfirst into much-deserved obscurity.

Make anthonyrosania's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 plus 1?

3 8 1 6
46 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more