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Saturday, 23 October 2010

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Joe Halfyard, the man with the world's longest penis and a member of the Navajo tribe in the Four Corners area of the United States says that he is lonely, that he has money from selling mineral rights and that he is looking for a 'fat bride' who doesn't have to be Navajo!

"I've already tried running ads in the Farmington Native American but my reputation out there has frightened everyone off either by word of mouth or by my revealing something big to them once they visit me", stated Halfyard.

Friends of Joe say he is a very friendly guy but that he is handicapped by his condition.

"Joe attends a lot of our ceremonies and has even had a special one just for him so we expect something big to pop up", says Joes cousin, Linda Cowbell.

Meanwhile Joe has gone on a Talk Show in Los Angeles and lots of interested callers have stated their interest but tirteen backed out and two just wanted Joe to star in some 'Private' movies.

"I still have one caller who says she will be here and has stated that she has the qualifications...that she's a whopper. Well what I need is a big fat belly."

Meanwhile in other news, friends of Kirstie Alley say she has actually went back to eating sweets and has been dancing around her house until her neighbor called to ask why both their houses were shaking.

"Probably another earth tremor", she told him. "We're in earthquake territory."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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