Written by Vicky Hinault

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Wednesday, 20 October 2010

image for Jay Z's has more than 99 problems
JayZ is likely to soon have to disguise himself

Cocksure rap star and Oasis offender Jay Z has reportedly broken down after news that his 99 problems have now expanded to 101.

Famed for stating 'A bitch ain't one' of his problems the rapper, real name Shawn Carter is reportedly running scared after Beyonce, his wife, has announced she is expecting their first child.

With the news that he is to become a father JayZ has told friends he is concerned that the family man label will destroy his 'gansta' credibility and is secretly planning to reignite his East Coast vs West Coast war with the deceased 2Pac.

Having claimed to have written a song in retaliation to an attack by 2Pac, who died in 1996, Jay Z feels that now is the time to reignite this feud with the release of the as yet un-named track.

Despite Shakurs death JayZ is said to believe that by releasing this song 14 years after originally planned it will divert attention from the fact that he is to become a father.

Reports that Beyonce is tooling up for the onset of this rap war are as yet, unconfirmed.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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