Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Wednesday, 13 October 2010

image for Katie Waissel - World's Most Loved

In one of the most remarkable PR turnarounds in history, X Factor wannabe Katie Waissel is today the most-loved person in the world.

As we reported yesterday, a PollsRUs poll had shown that Katie was more reviled even than historical evil-doers like Hitler, Stalin or Gengis Khan.

But overnight another poll has completely reversed the position.

Said PollsRUs spokesman, Neville Stupid: "This is incredible. I've never seen anything like it.

"Most people are saying that it was seeing her go home to visit her mum that changed their opinion of her. You can't beat going to see your old mum. Everyone loves a mum!"

PR Guru Barry Sparrow of The Firm, told us: "F*** me sideways! What a result. The Girl's a f****n' genius. I would never have thought of that. Note to self: when someone's in the shit, tell 'em to go and see their mum."

One poll respondent, said she felt she loved Katie now more than the Madonna: "That's the Madonna - you know, Mary, Jesus's mum, not the singing one. Oh no, I could never love anyone more than her."

The results show that 80 per cent love Katie the most, the Madonna came in second with 75 per cent, while St Theresa got 48 per cent of the vote. (Do you know anything about percentages? I thought I fired you. - ed.)

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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