DALLAS - A dejected Tony Romo sat all alone in the Dallas Cowboys locker room. It was now midnight and all of the players, coaches, cheerleaders, and hot dog vendors had all long since gone home after the Cowboys has suffered their third loss in four games at the hands of the Tennessee Titans.
The only person who remained was Orton Snookmeister, who is one of the locker room custodians. He told Tony that he could stay as long as he wanted to.
Tony asked Orton what he felt was wrong with the team that many felt could go all the way to the Super Bowl.
"Well sir," Orton remarked, "It really taint no secret Mr. Tony, but y'all duzz sho nuff get a heck of a whole lotta penalties."
Tony shook his head in agreement. Orton went on to say that last year everyone blamed Flozell Adams, who was the most penalized player in the entire NFL.
"But Mr. Tony, old Flo he be gone now...so what gives?"
Romo shook his head again and said that it appears that the team just does not seem to have the fighting spirit that an NFL team has to have in order to win.
He pointed out that Coach Jeff Fisher's Tennessee Titans are probably the worst trash talkers in the entire NFL and quite possibly in any professional sport as well.
Tony said that he has heard some cuss words come out of the mouths of the Titan players that he hadn't heard since his high school days. He said that some of the Titans can even cuss in Spanish, Samoan, Cherokee, and Yiddish.
Orton laughed and asked "Yiddish Mr. Tony?"
Orton grinned and said that it was wrong of Mr. Jerry Jones to have blamed Jessica Simpson (Tony's ex-girlfriend) for their losses two years ago.
He then stated that it was also wrong for Mr. Jerry to have blamed Kim Kardashian (Miles Austin's girlfriend) for the Cowboys 0-2 start this year.
Orton giggled and said, "But ja know Mr. Tony, da boss he now be puttin' da blame fo da 1-3 record on his very own wife. Taint right Mr. Tony, taint right at all."
Orton then suggested that maybe Tony should talk to Mr. Jones and ask him if he would like for him to get back together with Jessica Simpson, since everyone knows that it sure wouldn't hurt nothing.
Tony's eyes lit up like stars. He stood up and gave Orton a high five. He thanked Orton and told him that he was going to make an appointment with Mr. Jones the first thing in the morning and run that idea past him.
Orton laughed and said, "Mr. Tony, I sho can tell dat ja still be sweet on dat gal huh?"
"Yeppers Orton. I have missed that gal more than anyone could ever know."
SIDENOTE: Tony Romo was so thrilled with Orton Snookmeister's suggestion that he took off his football jersey and his football pants and autographed them and gave both to Orton along with a signed football and his Dallas Cowboys baseball cap.