Written by anthonyrosania
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Topics: Mariah Carey

Wednesday, 29 September 2010

image for Mariah Carey's Fall Does Tens Of Dollars Of Damage In Singapore
ABOVE: Mariah Carey had 'F4J' tattooed to her left side, to promote her religious organization, "Fat 4 Jesus."

Mariah Carey, the woman who was married to a record producer before he left her for a hot Mexican chick 55 years his junior, who then gained about 6,000 pounds and ended up marrying the guy who chewed on the scenery for every one of the 110 minutes that hideous movie "Drumline" defiled movie screens, who then did this stupid-ass show for MTV, where a bunch of ganster-wannabes 'dissed' one another for cash and prizes, only to have that cancelled, after which he was hired to replaced Howard Stern doing the morning radio shift on 92.3 K-Rock, which lost 99.9% of its listeners after Stern was originally replaced by balding rock-grandpa David Lee Roth, then Opie and Anthony, and then by him, after Infinity Broadcasting changed its name to CBS Radio, like that would give them any credibility, considering the Tiffany network only has programming for people aged 85 and up, and then they had the brilliant idea to change K-Rock's format, from Modern Rock, which made them the only Rock station in New York City not playing Moldy-Oldies and having 'Double-shot Tuesdays', and changed to a Hip-Hop and R&B station, which made them the 21,845th Hip-Hop station in the city, did tens of dollars of damage to the stage she was heffelumping-around on in Singapore, which doesn't really translate to American dollars because the economy of Singapore makes Ethiopia look like the financial center of the universe, by comparison.

One Sentence?

Yes, and it is grammatically correct. Neat, huh?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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