Written by masterchev
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Topics: Actors, Dwarfs, Hobbit

Sunday, 26 September 2010

image for Hobbit actors are "short in talent"
This garden dweller didn't get a part as his acting was too wooden.

Duffy. Cheryl Cole. Kylie Minogue. That guy who played the blond hobbit in Lord of the Rings. The other three guys who were Hobbits but were actually 6 ft something or other.

These are the names currently being linked to being in the latest Hobbit films.

The films, currently in the pipeline following a breakdown in negotiations concerning pay, is thought to be back on track after the new director - Josh Vacher- put out an advert searching for "small actors".

Moments later, having turned down a call from Ben Affleck (who only heard the words small actors), he made a number of casting decisions for the new film.

Having lost Ian McKellen already, Vacher cast the role of Gandalf to Keanu Reeves, whereas Bilbo Baggins will be played by Mr. Blobby.

As for the celebrities at the top of the page, many who are around or under 5 ft tall, Josh has special plans for those.

"I'm gonna make 'em me Hobbits. Isn't that obvious?" Josh added jokingly as he painted a really huge table to further make the small celebrities smaller. I really want the people to feel that the celebrities really are Hobbits and aren't just faces put on the bodies of small children!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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