Mr Potato Head, the American, potato shaped toy has been a favourite among kids since the 1950s.
Its inventor, the real Mr Potato Head, who, like his toy, has detachable facial furniture and a head shaped like a potato, would spend hours amusing his children as they sat on his lap removing his, nose, mouth, ears etc and rearranging them into the various slots on Mr Heads, King Edward shaped swede.
It was then he decided to create a toy that would give the children of the world as much fun as his own kids had, as they played with his physiological accoutrements, Mr Potato Head was born.
Fast forward, to present day Utah, where Mr Head is now residing on his potato ranch, bought from the proceeds of his toys. But despite the wide open acres and life on the open range full of simplicity, all is not well at ranchero los patatas.
Mr Head is furious, all the media hoopla surrounding England's Wayne Rooney has filtered through and Mr Head wants to bring an end to people using his name as a euphemism for the debauched soccer star.
"I've had it up to here" said Mr Potato Head, as he held his detachable arm up with his other arm to just above his Brown Derby shaped plastic hat "I am nothing like that young scallywag, I am a decent, honest hardworking kinda potata and don't want to have my good name associated with that silly boy and his out of control tadger.