Written by Abel Rodriguez
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Tuesday, 24 August 2010

image for Lily Allen Attacks Simon Cowell's X-Factor Calling It Re-Cycled Rubbish
Lily is the owner of two female lesbian pigs, Betsy and Bessie, who were a gift from Elton John who absolutely hates Lily.

LONDON - Lily Allen, has flat out spoken her mind (again). And this time the recipient of her serpentine venom is none other than "Mr. Reality Shows" himself Simon Cowell.

Lily was apparently lashing out at Cowell's X-Factor saying that it is nothing more than re-cycled rubbish.

Many feel that Lily was angry at Cowell because last year he joked about the fact that she (Lily) is the proud owner of three nipples, which she is.

But it is clearly obvious that Ms. Allen did not appreciate Cowell pointing out the tri-nips phenomena, which is known as polythelia.

At the same time Cowell pointed out that it was really no big deal because American Idol winner Carrie Underwood is afflicted with the same affliction and she is still an extremely popular performer.

He then said that one never hears Carrie complaining about someone mentioning it, talking about it openly, or even showing photos of the three champagne corks.

The British lass Lily replied "Hey, I duzn't give a bloomin' fook what dat Underwear woman duz or sez. I only care about what I fookin duz or sez ya see?"

Simon was reportedly so mad that he is thinking about having Miss Allen blackballed from ever performing in the United Kingdom again.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: And let me say that Simon Cowell has enough clout to make that very well happen.]

When Lily heard Cowell's remark she just laughed and said that it'd be okay with her as she could just go perform in Denmark, Outer Mongolia, or Laos where she is very popular.

In other news: Sharon Stone has just informed the entertainment media that she will soon begin filming on 'Basic Instinct 9 - Grandma What The Hell Is That?'

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 multiplied by 4?

6 23 8 9
92 readers are online right now!

Go to top