The judge leading the very short proceedings at the divorce case of Tiger Woods and his estranged ex-wife Elin, decided to value the amount of damages to be awarded by the length of Tiger's uncontrollable "dick" because that was the reason for the break-down of the marriage.
Tiger's well known infidelity turned out to be one of the most expensive cases of uncontrolled "dick" ever recorded and when the judge confronted Tiger with his damage evaluations he just gave the following answer:
"Sir, Tiger Woods, your uncontrollable 'dick' has caused much misery and I feel it is only correct to calculate the amount of damages payable to your ex-spouse by the size of your 'lethal weapon'!"
"you Sir will pay $10 million per inch and that roughly works out at a $100 million, case over!"
An aggrieved Tiger left the court room wondering why the hell he wasn't born an Asian and not a Negro, then he certainly would have had to pay much less!
As for Elin, she's looking forward to the $100 million and a little less "black dick", "they're so untrustworthy" she flustered!