Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 21 August 2010

image for Bikini-Clad LeAnn Rimes Performs An R-Rated Dance Routine On America's Got Talent
LeAnn backstage after she had changed out of her bikini swimsuit. (Photo courtesy of Nick Cannon).

HOLLYWOOD - The host of America's Got Talent Nick "The Yardstick" Cannon could barely contain his joy and jubilation as he watched 28-year-old LeAnn Rimes jump, and spin, and twist, and glide all over the AGT stage in a navy blue and red bikini swimsuit.

Rimes was performing to her brand new song "Swingin'" and she certainly did justice to the songs name. The song won John Anderson the CMA single of the year back in 1983, but everyone agreed that Johnny never looked one-tenth as good singing it as LeAnn Rimes did.

After the show Anderson called Rimes and told her that he heard the first few notes and lyrics of the song and then he lost track of the song and he got lost in her wondrously fine looking body.

Anderson noted that if her boyfriend Eddie Cibrian ever cheats on her again, he will personally look him up and beat the hell out of him with a wooden guitar.

AGT male judges Piers Morgan and Howie "The Germ Freak" Mandel were so smitten that they could not even talk. Even the lone female judge Sharon Osbourne remarked that she isn't a guy but that she wouldn't mind gettin' into little LeAnn's bloomin' knickers and doing an Ellen DeGeneres imitation.

SIDENOTE: The word from the streets of Nashville is that Rimes purposely showed off her body so that she could advertise to millions of available guys just exactly what goods she just happens to have underneath the hood.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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