Written by Skoob1999
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Friday, 20 August 2010

image for Robert Pattinson Not Named 'Sexiest Man Alive' By GCHQ Magazine
GCHQ This Afternoon.

Twilight heart throb Robert Pattinson, who plays vampire Edward Cullen in the Twilight saga of movies may have been voted the sexiest man alive by teen readers of several magazines, but GCHQ Magazine was not one of them.

The editor of GCHQ Magazine explained to our showbiz correspondent, Buffty Ginslinger, that GCHQ, based in Cheltenham, England, UK was all a bit hush-hush, and that the magazine hadn't actually conducted a poll in order to ascertain who is the world's sexiest man.

Apparently GCHQ Magazine usually publishes internal articles about promotions, retirements, anniversaries, birthdays, charitable events participated in by GCHQ employees, such as sponsored parachute jumps, and the current state of GCHQ.

It seems that somebody, somewhere has got their wires crossed, like the journalist who reported that Kristen Stewart is pregnant with Robert Pattinson's baby, when what they actually meant to say was that Molly Dobbs out of Coronation Street was pregnant with either Tyrone Dobbs's or Kevin Webster's baby.

"I don't care anyway," Twilight fan Lorinda Ellercinda, of Hog Jaw, Arkansas told us. "I think R-Pattz is the sexiest thing on two legs, and so does my cousin Elmer. And Elmer isn't even gay!"

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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