BBC chiefs have denied that they are prepared to go to any lengths to keep the identity of one of its stars a secret.
They are involved in a legal battle to prevent Top Gear mystery driver, The Stig, from revealing his identity in a planned autobiography
But the Spoof understands that rumours of a "contract" on the white-suited star are circulating the underworld.
A source said: "I've heard that someone was offering 30 large to have a TV driver taken out. Apparently the target is easy to spot because he wears a white driving suit and helmet.
"One or two likely lads of my acquaintance are very interested in the job."
There has been much speculation as to Stig's identity - some believe he is a former racing driver such as Damon Hill.
A BBC spokesperson said: "We can categorically state that the BBC does not issue contracts to have employees - or anyone for that matter - murdered. It is not involved in any criminal activity whatsoever."