HARLEM - The Reverend Al Sharpton, unofficial mayor of Harlem, has said that the rumors are true. Naomi Campbell, Kanye West, and Chris Brown will all be starring in The Three Stooges Come To Harlem.
The film which was directed by famed director, and one of America's top NBA basketball fans, Spike Lee tells the story of two dumbass chumps and one dumbass chumpette who arrive in Harlem to try and educate the kids and hopefully get them to give up the Ebonics ways.
In the film, which runs an amazing four hours and four minutes Naomi Campbell stars as Felicia Loshandra Bootyfield, a woman who was born in Kenya, raised in Zimbabwe, married in Botswana, and divorced in Las Vegas. She claims to know more slang black phrases than the entire Baltimore Ravens football team combined.
Kanye West, stars as Chadley Moselle Blingbox, a man who spends his life going around and showing everyone that what they do and say is totally wrong and then he proceeds to show them exactly how they need to do and say what he wants them to do and say so that people don't end up laughing at them and calling them racist names like (blank), (blank), and (blank).
Chris Brown stars as Rufus "Twinky" Taylorwood, a sort of swishy man who thinks that he can sing, but in reality he sounds like a cross between Tatiana Del Toro and Queen Elizabeth.
Taylorwood enjoys going to karaokes and shouting out things like "Everybody!" and "Hello (INSERT NAME OF CITY HERE)," and "That's right. I'm real good. And if you noticed, I did not lip sync like all dem White bitches like Britney Spears, Ashlee Simpson, and dat little 10-year-old from America's Got Talent Jackie Evancho done did."
The film will have its premier in Bindura, Zimbabwe. Director Spike Lee will host a special post premier Zebra Berbecue in the courtyard of the famed Hotel Tarzan.