Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 4 August 2010

image for Jay Leno Denies That He Allowed Heidi Montag To Fondle His Humongous Chin For Ten Minutes
This is Heidi's pet dog "Titties" which she named after her boobs. (Photo courtesy of Charlie Sheen).

HOLLYWOOD - The host of The New, New Tonight Show, Jay Leno, is denying reports published in TV Guideline Magazine that he allowed guest Heidi Montag to fondle his gigantic chin in his dressing room after a recent appearance.

Leno, who is 60, said that yes, it is true that he went against Tonight Show regulations and allowed Ms. Montag back into his dressing room.

And yes, he admits that he did pour them each a glass of Chablis. And yes, he also admits that he may have accidentally rubbed up against her enormously colossal pair of knockers two or five times, but he wants it made perfectly clear that he did not allow her to fondle his chin for ten minutes.

The late night talk show host said that being Italian, he has a tendency of one of his highly erogenous zones being on his monstrous chin.

He giggled and said that if Ms. Montag had even fondled his unbelievably huge chin for 8 seconds it would have made that Icelandic volcano seem like a little baby spitting up by comparison. Leno winked.

Leno did say that all of the rumors about one actually being able to smell the plastic if one is close to Heidi are absolutely true.

He said that as soon as she walked into his dressing room, he immediately went back to his childhood days and remembered those little kid plastic toys you actually made with a little baking machine; creepy crawlers.

SIDENOTE: Leno said that Ms. Montag is still devastated over her divorce from Spencer Pratt. Jay confessed that he did tell her that if she needs a shoulder to cry on that he has two. He smiled, winked again, and added that if she needs a groin dangler to cry on, that he can certainly provide that as well.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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