Written by Charpa93
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Sunday, 1 August 2010

image for Jersey Shore Looking to Move Permanently to South Beach
Snooki's sneakers

With the governor of New Jersey, Chris Christie, threatening to throw the entire cast of Jersey Shore out on their patooties, the producers of the show are shopping around for another state with a shore that will take them.

So far Virginia has said absolutely no way, their own home state of New York said no in the first place, and although the state of Maine said they'd be glad to take them, simply for the publicity, is out because it is just too damned cold for Snooki.

So where to? The producers are looking at Florida again. Half the state of New York resides in the southern part of the State of Florida anyway, so they're used to the "shenanigans of these hooligans," as the New Jersey governor put it. And since the show already shot a half season in South Beach, they are looking at this part of the country as a final resting ground for the Jersey Shore cast.

Florida governor Charlie Crist, priding himself on being more forward thinking than Chris Christie (I am not making these names up), claims that bringing the Jersey Shore to the shores of Florida makes a lot of sense. "We handle the whack jobs every day in this state. Our beautiful weather is a big draw to people, especially like Snooki, who obviously suffers from fried 'tanning-bed brain' as we call it. Our police professionals are equipped with the latest tools to keep the group in line, including the very best in taser weaponry."

Producers are seriously considering the move if not for the reason that their days are numbered in New Jersey, for the fact that filming in Florida could last all year long, and they know how much that would mean to the viewing public to have a full year of Snooki and the Situation liven up their dull and boring lives.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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