Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 27 July 2010

image for Doctor Orders Angelina Jolie To Get Her Big Lips Reduced or Risk Looking Like Mick Jagger or Steven Tyler
Angelina Jolie does not think that she needs to have lip reduction surgery.

LOS ANGELES - Angelina Jolie's face doctor, Dr. Vernon Celticbridge, has informed the movie starlet that her lips augmentation surgery has continued to increase in size and that the lips are getting pretty close to starting to look a little bit on the gross side.

Dr. Celticbridge, who performed the collagen implants on the eccentric actress, stated that at first Jolie's lips looked normal, except for the fact that they were three times the size of a normal woman's lips, of course.

The doctor told Ms. Jolie that if she does not get her lips reduced in size, pretty soon she is going to resemble Mick Jagger and Steven Tyler

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Angie, baby, sweety, please listen to me hon. Get your friggin lips reduced. Have you not seen photos of Mickey Jagger and Stevie Tyler. Woof! Come on girlfriend!]

Dr. Celticbridge went on to add that he also worked on Lisa Rinna's lips and sad to say, that procedure got out of hand, as anyone who has seen recent Internet photos of Ms. Rinna can clearly tell.

Celticbridge, said that when Angelina first approached him about doing the lips enhancement he agreed to do it since both her lips were pretty much the size of two skinny little stick pretzels, minus the salt of course.

He said that the surgery was a success and Jolie was so thrilled that she even gave him a $2,000 tip.

But over the years, since the movie star has lost some weight on her body, her lips have remained the same size, but they now look like they are way out of proportion with the rest of her body.

The doctor stated in confidence that Brad Pitt had called him and asked him to please tell Angelina that her lips are starting to look scary as hell and to convince her to have lip reduction surgery to remove about 12 ounces from each lip.

Pitt said that he is very afraid that their kids could become traumatized.

The actress sternly refuses to have lip reduction surgery saying that she looks very pretty and that she gets at least two or five compliments on her lips each and every day.

She noted that while filming her latest movie Salt, she was told every day by her co-stars, director, producer, hair stylist, masseuse, and even some homeless people how nice and succulent her lips looked.

Jolie added that she did have a slight injury to her bottom lip during one of the riding on the top of a runaway bus scenes.

SIDENOTE: Angelina Jolie pointed out that she did all of her own stunts and suffered several injuries including a dislocated thumb nail, a sprained labia majora, an unbalanced left nostril, a misaligned left nipple, and a detached G-spot.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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