LA BREA, California - Mel Gibson's ex-girlfriend and ex-future wife Oksana Grigorieva was sitting on the front porch of her trailer house at The Left Coast Sunset Trailer Park, located two miles from the famed La Brea Tar Pits.
She was speaking with a reporter for Rumor Monger Revue. Oksana was asked if she had received any money from her ex-boyfriend and the father of her daughter Sparky.
Oksana said that the only money she had received from Mel "From Hell" was $3 in quarters, which he gave her three weeks ago.
She said that Gibson, who was worth $1 billion before his divorce from his Australian wife Robyn is one of the greediest, most miserly, bastard punks she has ever known.
Oksana added that Gibson makes Adolf Hitler look like Captain Kangaroo.
Grigorieva was asked if she has made any money playing any concerts since she is an accomplished pianist. She smiled and said that no one wants to book her because they are afraid that Gibson will show up at the performance and start yelling at her and beating her while she plays songs by Mozart, Beethoven, and Tchaikovsky.
She said that she has applied for unemployment benefits. She is also carving little wooden miniature vuvuzelas which she hopes to sell directly to South Africa.
Oksana was asked about the relationship between Gibson and Britney Spears. She became somewhat sad and said that yes, it is true Mel "The Shit From Hell" has reportedly been seeing that fake blonde Spears woman.
She went on to say that back when Britney was run out of Australia for lip syncing entire concert performances Gibson was the only one who called her up and offered her his shoulder along with his wiggle widget.
So now that Mel has made his daily ranting and raving appearances on YouTube, Britney is the only one who has reached out to him. She supposedly has offered Mel her shoulder, her stomach, her thighs, her calves, and her tuzzy muzzy.
Oksana went on to say that she has nude photos of both Mel and Britney. When asked if the couple is together she replied that they are not. She said that she took some nude photos of Mel while he was passed out drunk on 13 different occasions.
Regarding the nude photos of Britney she said that she merely downloaded those at a little known site on the Internet at www.britneyspearsandhermuffin.sex
In other news. Rosie O'Donnell says that Russian spy Anna Chapman is so deliciously sexy that she would pay her $1,000 just to look at one of her bazongas, or $1,800 to look at both.