Written by Bureau
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Topics: Bono, Sunglasses

Tuesday, 20 July 2010

image for Ever Wonder Why Bono Always Wears Sunshades?

If you see Bono photographed anywhere he always has his shades on, but few ask why.

Apparently Bono was born with an eye disease called Albentism or Elberwaer's Disease. Some doctors even call it "Bono's Eye Problem!"

He's is almost like a vampire in the daytime and even has to wear dark glasses at night when the moon is bright or when he's in a big city with lots of lights.

He recently told Eyechart News that his condition was very rare and had something to do with his eyes not working right.

"I go outside and if I didn't have my eye shades on, my eyes would see an Aura similar to those who have migraine headaches. Then the Aura would change into an Aurora and finally, an Aurora Borealis in which everything would look like they were painted different colors in waves that pass over my head."

The disease is so rare that Bono has allowed some research to be done on himself.

"I think I'm the only true victim of Elberwaer's Disease that has been studied."

Bono reports that he had actually only had the experience one time but that he was sure he didn't want to ever have it again. So he's worn sunglasses ever since that party at Timothy O'Leary's house, where it first happened many years ago.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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