Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 19 July 2010

image for Drug Sniffing Dogs Find Seven Pounds of Viagra Pills In Paris Hilton's Bikini Taco
Buster (L) and Blister (R), the two drug sniffing dogs who found the seven pounds of Viagra pills in Hilton's hoo-ha.

CORSICA - Airport police at Corsica's Zorba The Greek International Airport reported finding seven pounds of Viagra pills that American socialite and do nothing rich girl Paris Hilton had stuffed inside her bikini taco (vagina).

The airport's two award winning drug sniffing dogs Buster and Blister reportedly went crazy when Miss Hilton approached airport security. The dog handler stated that Blister got so excited that he almost broke his leash.

Buster got even more excited and actually peed on the airport carpet, which he had not done since he was a puppy.

When security guards asked Miss Hilton if she had anything to declare, she smiled, giggled, and said that she declared that it sure was hot and she asked if someone could be a sweetheart and get her a Perrier Water and a Hostess Twinkie.

Miss Hilton was told that she was going to have to agree to a strip search. She said that she did not really feel that it was warranted and besides she was not wearing any underwear.

She was asked if she was refusing. She replied that she most certainly was and again asked for the water and the Twinkie.

A female security guard grabbed her by her shoulders and tossed her to the floor. She then pounced on her like stink on pig #2, and was told that if she opened her mouth she would get a woman's very unfeminine hairy hand shoved in it.

Another security guard, this one a 300 pound male, held Paris down while the female security guard spread her legs open. Paris screamed that they had no right to touch her pee pee.

The male guard told her to shut up and that he was gay and besides she was in Corsica and not on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills.

The female guard reached into Paris's you-know-what and pulled out seven pounds worth of blue Viagra pills.

Paris immediately said that the pills were for her 98-year-old grandfather Cuppy Hilton, who lives in a senior citizens home in Carpinteria, California.

She pointed out that Granpa Cuppy still likes to do the 'wild thang' at least once or twice a day, sometimes whether he has a lady friend available or not.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I asked Abel, exactly what that meant and he said that he would rather not tell me. He said something about it being a somewhat unpleasant as hell picture.]

The Corsican authorities released Paris Hilton after she signed autographs, handed out 50 percent off coupons to any Hilton Hotel in the world, and let airport personnel photograph her private parts for their own personal enjoyment.

SIDENOTE: Paris did deny that she has had any type of plastic surgery done to either her labia majora or her labia minora. She giggled when asked if she had, had anything done to her playpen.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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