Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 13 July 2010

image for Ryan Seacrest Dumps The Dominatrix And Takes Up With Julianne Hough The Sweetheart of Dancing With The Stars
Julianne Hough, 21, is Ryan Seacrest's new "sweety."

ITALIAN RIVIERA - The host of American Idol Ryan Seacrest has just admitted that yes it is true that he has dumped his girlfriend America's Got Talent's whip-cracking dominatrix Maricar and taken up with Dancing With The Stars' Julianne Hough.

Seacrest stated that he really did not want to say too much about the breakup other than to say that there were times during their relationship, usually late at night and involving handcuffs, when he actually began to fear for his life.

When asked to elaborate Seacrest declined saying that he did not want to do or say anything that could anger or enrage Maricar to the point of possibly her going all "Mel Gibson" on him.

Ryan did say that he wishes Mari Mari well and he knows that she will make some guy, somewhere a very happy guy.

Seacrest was asked about his new relationship with the sweetheart of Dancing With The Stars Julianne Hough. Ryan immediately began to blush and one could clearly see that there was some happy stirrings in the crotch of his jeans.

Julianne is the younger sister of Derek "The Dancing Dude" Hough, BFF and future husband of England's very popular singer Cheryl "Chezza" Cole.

Ryan said that the 21-year-old Julianne is the best girlfriend that he has ever had and that includes such fine girlfriends as Teri Hatcher, Sheryl Crow, Mexico's Paulina Rubio, and England's Pixie Lott.

The happy couple was vacationing aboard Ryan's private 70-foot yacht The Sing Song off the Italian Riviera.

Julianne was asked what exactly it is about Ryan that she loves the most. She replied that she loves the way Ryan smiles, touches her face gently with his hand, and then delicately moves down towards the gardenesque area between her lusciously flawless thighs.

She went on saying that Ryan then softly and with all the tenderness of a gentle gentleman smoothly caresses the area of her body that she likes to refer to as her golden happy valley (muffin).

Hough has just finished recording a duet with the recently married Carrie Underwood entitled, "Just Two Beautiful Blondes Out On The Prowl For Some Male Groin Gadgets."

In other news. When Queen Elizabeth was asked what she liked the best about her visit to America she giggled and said that she liked visiting Disneyland and especially she really loved it when Donald Duck goosed her.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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