Written by Abel Rodriguez
Print this

Saturday, 10 July 2010

image for Mel "Mad Max" Gibson Has Truly Gone Off The Effen Deep End
Many of his closest friends fear that Gibson is heading towards self-destruction.

MALIBU BEACH, California - A member of the Malibu Beach Police Department interviewed alleged Australian woman beater Mel Gibson about his alleged beatings of his girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva.

Ms. Grigorieva, who managed to get herself pregnant with the dumb ass Aussie's baby, says that Melly, as he calls him while in their lovemaking sessions, is a very, very temperamental fella.

She pointed out that she has seen him explode simply because she used Sweet 'N Low in his tea instead of Equal.

Oksana, who is 39, also stated that anytime he makes a joke she has to laugh out loud otherwise he will get offended and kick her in her shins.

She confessed that half of his jokes are about as funny as three-day old kangaroo shit.

Grigorieva went on to inform the member of the MBPD that Gibson has made racist remarks to her about Jews; blacks; Hispanics; Chinese; Seminoles; old women; fat women; wrinkled women, and old, fat, wrinkled women.

She said that the only group of people that he has never made a racist remark about are the citizens of the island of Fiji, Green Bay Packer fans, and the stars of the TV show The Vampire Dairies.

Oksana, said that in Gibson's latest outburst he somehow managed to swing her around so fast that her left kneecap somehow managed to end up on her right knee and her right kneecap somehow managed to end up on her left knee.

The Malibu Beach Emergency Clinic doctor who treated Oksana for this knee injury said that in his 37 years of practice he had never seen such an unbelievable injury.

He added that he had once seen a woman who had managed to get her left tit lodged in her right ear, but he had never seen anyone whose kneecaps had exchanged knees.

In a related story. California authorities are seriously considering deporting Mel "The Piece of Koala Bear Shit" Gibson back to Australia, where he can go and pick on some of the tough, rugged Aussie men, who will no doubt turn him into a wrinkled version of Clay Aiken in roughly 45 bloomin' seconds.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.

Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 plus 5?

8 13 10 19
34 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more