Written by Stevey G.
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Tuesday, 6 July 2010

image for Victoria to Sell Beckham's Sperm
Beckham has been stock-piling 'Spunk' in golden-balls over the last week.

As news breaks this morning that Cristiano Ronaldo is selling his sperm online, Victoria Beckham has issued a statement that she will be offering David Beckham's sperm for sale shortly.

'David's sperm is not currently available, we are presently working on building up stocks, but I can assure you that this is a quality product well worth waiting for'.

Victoria (aka Posh Spice) was keen to point out that David (35) has fathered three children that she knew of, and therefore this was a proven product. The potency of Ronaldo's offerings remains currently the subject of much conjecture and speculation.

Victoria became animated when discussing the marketing of the product. 'We agonised over the name' she said, 'Spermatazoa just didn't roll off the tongue. Someone else suggested Jism, but that seemed a little.....seedy'.

We can announce that the product will be marketed under the snappy name 'Spunk' and will be packaged in small golden balls.

'We love the name and the packaging' gushed Victoria, 'It's snappy and does just what it say's on the tin. One shot and it's in the bag'.

Well strictly speaking it's now out of the bag, but we think we know what you mean.

David was unavailable for comment, apparently he has not been seen in public since his return from the World Cup Tourmament almost a week ago. Victoria said that David was understandably tired. 'Setting up this business has left him feeling drained' she said.

'Watch out for 'Spunk' in quality stores in your area soon',
she concluded.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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