TULSA, Oklahoma - Justin Bieber performed at a sold out concert in Tulsa's Sooner or Later Arena and received the greatest ovation of his young career.
The applause was so deafening that many of the audience members said that they could not even hear themselves cough or sneeze.
One fan, 13-year-old Tapioca Shambling of Muskogee, Oklahoma, said that she was yelling and screaming so much that she almost swallowed her retainer.
She said that luckily for her an arena security employee saw her choking and he immediately picked her up, stood her on her head, and proceeded to gently kick her butt until the retainer popped out...of her mouth, not her 'you know what.'
Another fan Izzy Yawnflick, 15, said that Justin is more popular than iPods, iPhones, iCamera, and even idrugs. together.
Bieber, aka The Canadian kid was asked what he thinks about the tons of publicity that Miley has gotten the last few months from her pole dancing on an award show, to grabbing her crotch at a concert, to giving a lap dance to her gay movie producer, to sky diving wearing while wearing absolutely nothing but a wristwatch, and to exhibiting her little 'hooha' for everyone from Alabama to Zanzibar to see in living color.
Justin said that Miley is one young girl who definitely knows how to work it. He caught himself and noted that he meant the media not her wonky wonk (knick-knack).
When asked if he had seen the infamous 'wide open spaces' photo Justin blushed from ear to ear and even down to his groin region and said that he had seen it at least 17 times.
He smiled and said that he does not care what Boo Boo Stewart, Ryan Cabrera, Cameron Quiseng, and Glenn Beck said about her, he would still like to go out on a date with her and added that he would like to take a whole lot of photos of her various body parts including her infamous tuzzy muzzy.
In other music related news. Rapper Flavor Flav stated that in the interest of health and nutrition he will now be known as Diet Flavor Flav.