Washington, DC-- It was a night for the stars to shine, as Hollywood met Washington, at the brightly-lit Kennedy Center last night. One-hundred of Hollywood's wealthiest and most liberal citizens came to pay tribute to Michelle Obama with a night of songs and love. The collective IQ of the gathering was 91.
Brad, Angelina, Cher, George, Sean and Barbra were just some of the many stars that shone over the Potomac. Someone started a rumour in the audience that singer Whitney Houston would appear.
The trouble soon began when Mrs. Obama walked into the gathering.
"Sing us a song!" yelled Barbra Streisand to Michelle Obama. "Sing us something from 'My Body Odor', or whatever it was called." shouted the dolt.
Cher then ran up to the First Lady and also urged her to sing.
"Let's do a duet of 'Saving All My Luvs For You'!" she asked the startled woman.
Everyone knows most Hollywood stars are about as smart as the average sized lemon. Hollywood is also still remarkably very white. Mrs. Obama was the only woman of color in the entire room.
Mrs. Obama didn't know what to do. Someone gave her a microphone, and someone else shone a spotlight on her. She froze with fear.
"Sing!" the audience urged. "Sing!"
The First Lady didn't know what to do. She opened her mouth to sing. There was only one song in her panicked brain that she knew all the words to, and she began to sing it, although she didn't know why.
"O say can you see, by the dawn's early light, what so proudly we hailed..." she sang.
The audience of celebrities couldn't believe it! Many vomited on themselves as they ran for the doors.