Written by IainB
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Wednesday, 2 June 2010

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The old gypsy woman who does not like Leona Lewis

Willowy pop princess Leona Lewis is bringing in an exorcist for her current Labyrinth tour after an old gypsy woman cursed the show.

The old gypsy woman was waiting outside the stage door of the first show in Sheffield, begging for change. When the Lewis entourage swept past knocking the old woman to the ground they heard her curse the show and all that take part in it.

"At first we thought nothing of it," said tour manager and cousin, Lee Lewis. "However, when the lift that brings Leona onto the stage stuck and the fire brigade were called, doubts crept in."

Those doubts were solidified when an uncovered lift shaft in the Liverpool arena saw Leona fall ten feet to the bottom of the shaft. Fortunately, she was unhurt and able to carry on with the show.

"We're going to Nottingham next," said Lee Lewis. "We would really have liked the priest to meet us there, but the only priest in the country who is capable of performing an exorcism is currently working for Prince Charles who apparently is suffering from an old woman who is haunting his life."

Instead, the priest will meet them in Manchester, and bless the M.E.N arena. The Manchester arena will be closed the day before the gig in order for the priest to completely de-hex the whole place.

"It's a big undertaking," said Lee Lewis, "We just hope that Leona can make it through the Nottingham gig unharmed."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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